Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
being pregnant is like rehab
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Randomize
