just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
