I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize
