More tranny stories later!
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
this just has baby written all over it
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
