She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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