So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
