nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
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