i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
