She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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