Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
