How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Randomize
