I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize