You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
