His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
