He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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