I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
