I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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