Ambien. No doubt about it.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
