hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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