mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
