dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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