so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
My dick has a subreddit
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
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