we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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