community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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