margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
