God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
