Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
You ruined the universe
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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