You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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