How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
