I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Randomize
