Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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