awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
