This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
