i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
My breasts were aching with rage.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
