3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
