My nipple is on Facebook.
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
