Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
