grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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