Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
the condom got lost in my hair
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
You can't just leave with hair like that
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
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