have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
