The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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