Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
