I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
It was confusing and full of hummus
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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