So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
