I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
