Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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