haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
you made out with another girl for some wings
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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