you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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