mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
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