sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
