why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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